Worthless Trash
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The Great Parking Panic of 2026
A tale of deep breaths, aching stomachs, Lady Gaga, and hockey
Feb 18
•
Archer Parquette
34
9
3
Hypnotism, ‘Fun,’ and Islands of Strange Happiness
In which I experience an afternoon of mandatory activities and their consequences
Feb 11
•
Archer Parquette
39
3
2
‘Please Stop Being My Friend’
A tale of youthful misanthropy
Feb 4
•
Archer Parquette
60
11
7
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Frasier's Darkest Moment
Sep 4, 2024
•
Archer Parquette
1,123
77
108
Forgetting How to Walk: The Self-Consciousness Shuffle
Jan 8, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
136
35
16
The Heat Lamp and the Stairwell
Jan 29, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
113
27
14
The Strange Relief and Rest of My Aching Skull
Jan 22, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
100
20
6
The Tragedy of the Great-Grandma Bowl Cut
Feb 5, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
94
19
8
Running out of Time
Jan 7
•
Archer Parquette
83
26
9
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A Weirdo’s Syllabus, Part 1
None of these books will be on the midterm
Jan 28
•
Archer Parquette
43
4
4
Skidding Past Confidence
A story of snow-driving, wheel-whipping, and Danger
Jan 21
•
Archer Parquette
52
9
3
The Tale of the Great Re-Route
How road construction turned into a reconsideration of routine—and also Slim Jims
Jan 14
•
Archer Parquette
45
7
6
Running out of Time
On reading, cruel calculations, and learning to value what little remains
Jan 7
•
Archer Parquette
83
26
9
My Favorite Books of 2025
If you care what one weird short guy thinks, then this is the year-end list for you!
Dec 17, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
48
6
4
The Body-Snatching of the Customer Service Reps
On social performance and its discontents
Dec 10, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
55
3
3
An Ode to a Good Neighbor
Umbrellas, lost cats, and some guy who happens to live some place
Dec 3, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
77
14
10
The Gleaming Golden Glorious 100th Edition of Worthless Trash
Some thoughts on flossing.
Nov 19, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
48
10
3
The Misery and the Triumph of Parallel Parking
A tale of humiliation and glory on the roadways
Nov 12, 2025
•
Archer Parquette
64
14
3
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Worthless Trash
Just a little trash from my desk to yours. Jokes, books, movies, possum hygiene tips, etc.
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