I want to be clear from the start, I’m not really angsty. I’m definitely not a teenager anymore. I am a 42 year old woman who has anxiety, occasional depression, and a very sensitive soul.
I chose the title STILL TEEN ANGSTY for this Substack in a flippant way and now I’m stuck with it. Or am I?! … I’m not sure, I’m still figuring this out. At least I’m finally writing in it. But, if I wait any longer to come up with a new title for this I might never get started so, here we go…
Teen Angst is something that many people associate with me. I’ve been hosting a comedic storytelling event I call Teen Angst Night since 2000. This night will not die! Just when I think people’s interest has wained, the next show sells out. Even after a 3 year hiatus due to a global pandemic, with practically zero media attention for its 20th year, the show sold out the Fox Cabaret in Vancouver. (Next show is Friday, April 28)
So yes, I’m still “Teen Angsty”. I’m still doing “angsty things,” like worrying about the world, worrying if I’ll ever find love again, having anxiety because I’ve read too much about the long term issues with Covid as a way to feel informed and able to manage my anxiety, but it probably just created more angst.
When I’m feeling angsty and able to take a step away from it, I like to combat it with gratitude and silly things. This Substack thingy is an attempt to lean into that.
I’m grateful that you’ve signed up to read my most inner thoughts, that I am a person you’ve deemed worthy of your time. That’s a HUGE compliment! Thank you.
I’m grateful that I can put my MA in Creative and Life Writing to use. I have so much angst about the past decade plus of years that I’ve let a novel rot in a file in my computer and not produced much other writing. Maybe I’ll write about that or share a chapter from the aforementioned novel?
I am grateful that I finally tried medication for my anxiety and THE VERY FIRST ONE I TRIED WORKED! I’ll definitely write about that in the future. So, I’m much less angsty than I was when I chose the title of this Substack. Yay!
Silly things I hope to write about in the future include: my love of small dogs in outfits, really terrible dating reality shows like Too Hot To Handle (they take a bunch of dumb hot people and tell them they can’t make out with each other or they’ll lose prize money), and the joys of Square Dancing (I’m going to my first one since lockdowns in early May and I’m very excited!).
So really, thank you for signing up. I’ll do this again. And again. I can’t promise I’ll be super regular with it but that’s my hope. Maybe every two weeks to start. Then every week, no more. And don’t worry about paying for this, it’s going to be free.
Now, kick back, go listen to an album you loved when you were 14 years old, take out your journal and write about how grateful you are that you’re no longer a teenager. Then take inspiration from your teenage self and indulge in some time just chillin’.
Totally Buggin’
Sara Bynoe